Lately, I’ve been thinking about the Christian life and what it means to keep in step with the Spirit of God. Here are some of my thoughts:

Galatians 5:25 Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passion and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit.

In my faith-life I sometimes feel like it’s all about extremes. For example, when it comes to living the Christian Life, it’s all about me or God. Either I’m doing all the work in becoming more the person he wants me to be or he is. But, as I’ve reflected on the last forty-two years of my life, I’ve begun to realize it’s not a “me or him” thing. It’s really a matter of “us.”

I grew up Lutheran and one of the things I appreciate most about the Lutheran church is the emphasis on salvation by grace and not through works. In other words, I can’t save myself, nor should I try to. I can’t get to God on my own. Rather, God brought me back to himself through Jesus Christ.

But, and here’s the big one, I do have some responsibility in the Christian life—not to put out the Spirit’s fire, his work in my life. See, I do believe it’s possible to hamper the Spirit’s power by not falling in step with how he’s leading me.

Living the Christian life on my own would be impossible, there’s no two ways about that. But because I have the power to succeed through the Spirit, the one Christ sent when he left this earth, I have no excuses. I can’t live life for myself anymore, nor should I want to.

It’s not about me or God, him or me. It’s about us working together in harmony as he makes me more and more the person he wants me to be. And here’s the deal, I can either conform to those changes or I can resist them.

Galatians 5:25 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.

If I’m truly keeping in step with the Spirit, then the above qualities and traits should be flowing out of me.

Are they flowing out of you? If not, you might want to take some time and reflect on if you are keeping in step with the Spirit of God. If you’re not, what’s the point of being a Christian? Being saved is the beginning-not the beginning, middle and end of the Christian Life. Remember that truth and keep in step with the Spirit not just today, but always.

Galatians 5:25 Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passion and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit.

I’m mad tonight. Mad because you’re all making me stay up late when all I want to do is go to sleep. But here’s the deal, I can’t and here’s why, because you are all behaving badly, very very badly. I don’t care what side you’re on, you’re all being like petulant children who don’t get their way or do get their way and then rub it in everyone else's face.

See, I was going to write an encouraging blog this week, a blog about peace and love, and brotherhood and friendship. But not tonight. Tonight I’m just mad.

When I wrote the entry for Not My President, I didn’t think I’d go down this road again. I didn’t want to. I hate getting into politics. I hate talking politics. I hate even being political. But here’s what I don’t hate, when people get along and are nice to one another.

All right, now that my blood has cooled down a degree or two, here are some thoughts:

A few weeks ago or so, my husband and I were in a pseudo-disagreement. He has had a weight problem his entire life. As his wife of nearly fourteen years, I’ve been along for what has not always been such a fun ride. We’ve tried several diets and exercise programs, all of which have required, at one time or another, me to change my habits too—my cooking habits, my eating habits, my grocery shopping habits. I’ll just be honest. It hasn’t always been fun, but I want to be supportive and I want him to lose the weight.

So that night when we were arguing over how I could or could not be supportive of him, or what I should or should not be bringing into the kitchen, he looked at me and calmly said, “Look we both want the same thing. I don’t know why we’re fighting about this. We both want to be healthy for ourselves and for our family.” And the light bulb went on.

He was right. We do both want the same thing, a healthy family. We may have different opinions about how to get there, but in the end there’s a better way to reach our goal than to sit there and bicker with one another.

I’m taking a master’s class on collaboration in the world of education but there are some good lessons I’m learning from it. In the book collaboration is defined this way:
A style for direct interaction between at least two coequal parties voluntarily engaged in shared decision making as they work toward a common goal. (And yes, I felt boldface type was required there.)

But you know what you need to have to reach that level of adulthood? First, you need to grow up and realize that your side is not the only side that’s right all the time. Thinking your views, your ideals, your opinions are the only ones that matter is a completely shallow and selfish way to live.

You really want to make America great or great again? Then put down the sand and stop throwing it at one another. Stop acting like bratty children. And if you’re not going to do it for each other or our country, then do it for me, because I’m tired and I want to get some sleep.

I’m just going to put this out there. I have gained some weight. Admittedly, not a huge amount but enough that I notice the extra lumps and bumps, the less give in my pants, the tighter fit around my derriere. It’s the kind of weight that leaves me wearing sweat pants more frequently than I ought.

So yea, it hasn’t been a lot of fun. Actually, it’s been kind of depressing. And when I’m depressed, I go into my not so favorite mode: self-loathing.

Wikipedia describes self-loathing this way: Self-hatred (also called self-loathing) refers to an extreme dislike or hatred of oneself, or being angry at or even prejudiced against oneself.

Though Wikipedia isn’t the most reliable of sites it’s accurate as far as how I’m feeling about myself these days—extremely disliking myself, being angry, even prejudiced against myself.

Self-loathing is nothing new for me. In the past, it’s been something I’ve excelled in. Back in the day, pre-diagnosis, it manifested itself in many ways. One of my least favorite phrases repeatedly banging out in my head? “You’re so stupid. You’re so stupid. You’re so stupid.”

The thing is, self-loathing has never done me any good. It’s certainly not helping me now. It’s not making me eat healthier. It’s not improving my outlook on life, and it’s definitely not making my pants fit better. It’s just weighing me down—more than the extra pounds, really.

2 Corinthians 7:10 says, “Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death.”

The thing is when I’m practicing self-loathing I’m not practicing godly sorrow, because, you see, godly sorrow leaves no regret. No regret over that extra piece of chocolate cake, or that extra helping of chips, or forgetting to work out today. It’s not that I don’t need to learn self-control, it’s that I need to learn to stop hating every bad decision I make and, in the end, hate myself.

Godly sorrow leads to repentance with no regret.

God doesn’t loathe me. He doesn’t loathe every bad decision I make. He loves me. So me loathing myself isn’t healthy, it isn’t true, and it isn’t right.

My grandpa used to play a “game” with me called, Stop Hitting Yourself. In the game, he would take my hands in his, make fists out of them, and pretend to hit me, all the while saying, “Stop hitting yourself. Stop hitting yourself. Why are you hitting yourself?” Though I hated the game, nevertheless there’s a good lesson hidden in it. I need to stop hitting myself.

Are you practicing some downright mean self-loathing? Stop it. Stop it. It’s not doing you any good. In fact, if you’re anything like me it’s only making everything worse.

If you’ve got some things to fix, things to get right, then get before God and start fixing them. But get with God first, because part of turning things around is getting power from the only Source who can truly fix things, truly redeem things, Jesus Christ.

And while you’re at it, stop loathing yourself, stop playing the hitting yourself game. Remember that God certainly doesn’t loathe you. He loves you. Find the truth and beauty in that statement and live in faith, not in fear.